HEATHERLAND

Or also know as: A Lenten Reflective Journey…With Hiccups.

Ahhh, Facebook….the best online hang in the world to connect, yet simultaneously annoying, politically stressful and chock full of HACKERS.

Last month, I saw a dear friend involved in a Facebook #rethinkchurch daily practice, inspired by The United Methodist Church. She was participating with another lovely friend who moved to the Big Stone Gap, and it’s been nice to be able to keep tabs on her and her wonderful life out there. I was intrigued by the idea of spiritual reflection, with a sprinkle of accountability. It’s always been a good look for me. In the last three years, I very painfully lost my dad and have been suffering from chronic health issues. My kids are getting older, life is moving so much faster. I feel very grateful for my soul mate husband, my loving children, family, friends, my home and my life. I am washed over with the overwhelming need to express my gratitude and thankfulness.

I had somewhat of a darker experience with religion when I was younger. Dark isn’t quite the right word. It’s not a positive word to pinpoint, but it was…problematic? So, as we sometimes do, I put it all in my pocket and I shoved it in the back of the closet. Well. Seems like I’m feeling the need to clean a little house. Exploring my relationship with religion and God has slowing inched over to me on the couch. I’m starting to lean in and I’m starting to listen.

At the beginning of March, I started the daily #lentphotoaday, prompted by a suggested word. I would post it on my FB page, tagging my reflective Lent tribe. I loved it. I was waking up every morning, inspired by nature outside my window, old photos, memories and pulling out our old family Bible. It all felt very cathartic and warm to explore.

And then we got Facebooked hacked.

And then I got really sick.

And then, instead of being able to reflect on my past, present and future relationship with God, and preparing for Easter in my own little way, I was just praying to God that I would get better and not die in the hospital. Not the journey I was intending.

I was in there seven days with a virus that turned pneumonic, and heavy IV steroids that bumped me to coma-high blood sugars. All of that craziness thrust me into a rancid, full-blown case of Diabetes. It sounds dramatic because it is. It sucks. I’m home now in insulin, bruised like a pin cushion, beat-up, weak and exhausted. My new medical path has changed and I will be now focusing on getting better. But I remain positive because LIFE IS BEAUTIFUL. I am babying myself so I can keep plugging along. Summer is coming…summer is coming.

In the end, if I can also be honest, I think this worked out. It’s getting me writing again. Also, It was not a comfortable platform for me to be sharing my reflections anyway. My FB circle is used to handling my funny meme’s, annoying mom brag posts and lots of music promotional material. I think it works out for me to head over to this crazy little Heatherland. Its feels so much more appropriate; a public blog, but ironically personal, since no one really reads it.

Therefore, here I am, jumping back into the Lent pool.

Next post: The word of today is BRING.

Love you.